Contact theSOPAbout theSOPSupport theSOPWritersEditorsManaging Editors
theSOP logo
Published:June 16th, 2012 13:08 EST

Man Finds Spider In Bed, Runs Through Glass Door & Out Of House Naked As A Jaybird!

By Robert Paul Reyes

"The man from Albion in Illinois was so afraid when he clapped eyes on an eight-legged creature in his bed yesterday morning that he immediately made a run for it.

Unfortunately, such was his haste to escape his bedfellow he didn`t even have time to put his clothes on and residents in the north-eastern part of the town were in for an early morning eyeful.


As he made his bid for freedom he was still disoriented and cut his arms, legs and finger when he accidentally went through a glass door."

Daily Mail

If I see a spider in my bed I might wet my drawers and shriek like a schoolgirl, but I will manage to maintain my dignity and composure. I won`t run out of my house naked as a jaybird, giving my neighbors an eyeful.

This joker is lucky his manhood wasn`t sliced off running through a glass door, but a case could be made that he`s not much of a man, and he wouldn`t miss his privy member.

Police received numerous calls about the man running naked in the streets, but when they caught up with him he had returned home and put on a pair of shorts, or was it panties?

Authorities declined to press charges, they believed his claim that he suffers from arachnophobia.

The police didn`t release the wimp`s name, but his neighbors know his identity. This dude may develop another phobia: Agoraphobia, the fear of leaving your home.

Read more:

Follow Robert Paul Reyes on Twitter:

Photo Credit: Wikipedia