July 10th, 2012 09:23 EST
Cecil Murphey`s Response to the Jerry Sandusky Trial
The eighth young man, a recent high-school graduate, was the last prosecution witness to testify in the Jerry Sandusky trial. When questioned by the defense lawyer, he said, "I just dealt with it."
I doubt it.
Or maybe he did -- the way many of us dealt with our molestation. We struggled inwardly. We tried to deny it happened. We determined not to talk about it and thus we`d forget. None of those strategies worked.
So we didn`t deal with it. But we tried.
And we tried.
And too many are "just dealing with it" even now.
It takes courage to speak up about our abuse and to let the world see that we were victimized by older, larger people. We didn`t expect to be believed as children; why should we expect to be believed after 10 or 40 years?
But some -- like that 18-year-old boy and the others who have testified in the trial -- have come into the open. They`ve told their story.
And many of us believed them.
"I just dealt with it."
I hope I never have to hear another survivor say those words.
About the Author
Cecil (Cec) Murphey, veteran author or co-author of more than 130 books, including the NY Times bestseller "90 Minutes in Heaven" (with Don Piper) and "Gifted Hands: The Ben Carson Story" (with Dr. Ben Carson), hurt for a long time because of childhood sexual abuse. Now he helps others who hurt through his book "When a Man You Love Was Abused," his blog for male survivors (www.menshatteringthesilence.blogspot.com), and speaking at conferences and seminars nationwide. Kregel Publishing plans to release "Not Quite Healed" on February 1, 2013. He is available for interviews and speaking engagements.