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Published:December 1st, 2012 14:29 EST

Lady Beats Boyfriend With Foam-Rubber Bat, Then Switches To Aluminum Bat

By Robert Paul Reyes

"Mirivic Simpliciano, 30, was placed on probation in a Maui courtroom this week after pleading no-contest to beating her boyfriend in April, and told the court she thought she now had a handle on things.


`After the incident, I took the initiative to get some help,` Simpliciano said.

The incident began when Simpliciano`s boyfriend came in a little late at 7:30 p.m. She started out flailing at him with a foam-rubber bat and a toy light-saber. But she moved up from kid toys to the real deal and let him have it with a metal bat, the newspaper said."


Simpliciano is certifiably bonkers or at the very least bat sh** crazy. It is a gentleman`s prerogative to arrive home a little bit late; for God`s sake he got home at 7:30 pm, not at 7:30 in the morning.

If a man comes home before the rooster crows, his lady should spread rose petals from the front door to the bedroom.

This woman`s boyfriend should kick her to the curb, if she`s this possessive now and they`re not even married, once they tie the knot she will probably be waiting for him with a sawed-off shotgun if he dares to be late again.

There are no shades of gray with this lunatic, when she saw that the foam-rubber bat wasn`t having the intended consequences, she quickly switched over to an aluminum bat. This type of female will kiss you passionately one moment, and deliver a good solid kick to your rear end a moment later.

Simpliciano took it upon herself to enroll in an anger-management class, but the judge should have given her a stiffer penalty than probation.

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