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Published:June 29th, 2013 11:39 EST

Suspected Feces From Airplanes Falls On Canadian Homes

By Robert Paul Reyes

"Two Ontario families said they are convinced passing airlines dropped feces on their properties, but aviation authorities disagree.


The Sullivan family of Mississauga said their driveway and three cars were splattered with what appeared to be feces dropped from a plane.

A similar incident took place in another Mississauga family`s back yard last week. Both families said they blame planes for the mess."


The Canadian families are assuming that the feces fell from the sky, and that an airplane is the culprit. I think these families are just looking for someone to sue, and airlines have deep pockets.

Let`s assume the poop fell from the sky, extraterrestrials onboard a flying saucer could have opened a hatch and dumped excrement on the Ontario families out of frustration that there wasn`t anything interesting to see in Canada.

There`s nothing to do in Canada but fling snow or dung around, bored kids could have showered the cars with doo-doo.

It could also be a jilted lover who splattered the cars with manure. There could be a hundred and one explanations, but I`ve run out of synonyms for caca, and so this article must come to an end.

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