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Published:September 20th, 2015 09:52 EST

General Mills Giving Away Selfie Spoons For Free! The End is Near! Video!

By Robert Paul Reyes

Selfie sticks had become ubiquitous at sporting venues until the forces of decency and morality struck back, and the infernal devices were banned from most sporting events.


But evil never sleeps, and evil never takes a holiday, and now General Mills has introduced a selfie spoon, a selfie stick with a spoon at the end that extends up to 30 inches so cereal eaters can take pics of themselves while eating cereal. Terrific, now you can eat the Breakfast of Champions and make a total dork of yourself at the same time.

Parents for God`s sake don`t let evil take up residence in your home, if your son or daughter uses a selfie spoon while eating breakfast, beat the devil out of them with a baseball bat.

Selfie spoons are truly the devil`s handiwork, General Mills is giving away the things for free, they want to make it as easy as possible for evil to spread in our great God-fearing nation.

Selfie spoons can be ordered for free now on, although customers have to pay for shipping.

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Photo Credit: Wikipedia