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Published:May 4th, 2017 10:17 EST

Evil Ronald McDonald Statue Stolen From McDonald's Restaurant

By Robert Paul Reyes

"Crime Stoppers in New Jersey is offering a reward for the return of a life-size Ronald McDonald statue stolen form a local restaurant.

The Hunterdon County Prosecutor said the iconic 250-pound fiberglass statue was stolen from a McDonald`s restaurant between 11 p.m. April 26 and 10 a.m. April 27.

New Jersey Crime Stoppers is accepting anonymous tips and offering a reward of $500 to have the statue returned to its owners, Philip and Diane Koury, who have co-owned the franchise since 1991."


It doesn`t get any more evil than a life-size statue of a clown sitting on a bench outside of a McDonald`s restaurant, the civic-minded citizen who stole the abomination should be awarded a key to the city.

A clown is a universal symbol of evil, and to plant a statue of clown outside of a McDonald`s as a means of enticing young children to enter the Golden Arches that leads to obesity, tooth decay and myriad other diseases is the real crime.

Snitches get stitches and anybody who narcs on the gentleman who stole the accursed Ronald McDonald statue should end up looking as if he was sewn together by Dr. Frankenstein.

I hope the evil statue is never found, and I hope the evil McDonald`s goes out of business.

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