March 23rd, 2018 12:04 EST
Boxing Match Between Donald (Tiny Hands of Thunder) Trump and Crazy Joe Biden
At the University of Miami`s "It`s On Us" rally, aimed at creating an environment where sexual assault and gender-based violence is unacceptable, former Vice President mused about going Neanderthal on President Donald Trump (I guess Crazy Joe is OK with same-sex violence):
"A guy who ended up becoming our national leader said, `I can grab a woman anywhere, and she likes it.
They asked me if I`d like to debate this gentleman, and I said `no.` I said, `If we were in high school, I`d take him behind the gym and beat the hell out of him.`
I`ve been in a lot of locker rooms my whole life. I`m a pretty darn good athlete. Any guy that talked that way was usually the fattest, ugliest SOB in the room."
Noted counter-puncher Trump delivered a rapid-fire response on Twitter:
"Crazy Joe Biden is trying to act like a tough guy. Actually, he is weak, both mentally and physically, and yet he threatens me, for the second time, with physical assault. He doesn`t know me, but he would go down fast and hard, crying all the way. Don`t threaten people Joe!"
Can you imagine a boxing match between these demented septuagenarians?
Each round would last 30 seconds following by a five-minute bathroom break.
Trump would demand oversized boxing gloves to compensate for his tiny hands.
Instead of a traditional cut man who treats boxers for cuts and bruises during the breaks between rounds Trump would have a tan man to slather on fake orange tan, and Biden would employ a Rogaine man to tend to his hair implants.
Pervert Biden who never misses an opportunity to kiss, fondle and otherwise molest little girls would hire prepubescent cheerleaders to cheer him on at ringside, and Trump would invite Ivanka to sit on the front row and blow kisses at him.
Instead of a referee the fight would be officiated by a medical doctor.
Both fighters would be clad in black shorts, to hide their soiled diapers.
We feel ripped-off when a highly anticipated pay-per-view boxing match ends after only a couple of rounds, but if this epic match between Trump and Biden ends after only a minute because both combatants died of a heart attack, I don`t think a soul would complain.
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